Satirical Blappos illustration: Scientists put plastic bottles in cookies; recycling bin requests a lawyer
THE STORY BEHIND THE SATIRE · Carbondale, Illinois · Sep 13, 2026

Scientists put plastic bottles in cookies; recycling bin requests a lawyer

What happened

Researchers at Southern Illinois University Carbondale are engineering yeasts to convert molecules derived from PET plastic and agricultural waste into proteins, fats, vitamins and flavorings. Those ingredients can be combined with fiber, starch and sweetener, then 3D-printed into protein-rich cookies called µBites.

Why it matters

The NASA-backed work began as a way to make food where resupply is difficult, including long space missions. Researchers say available safety data are encouraging, but formal human taste testing still awaits institutional approval; the cookies have so far been judged mainly by aroma.

The Blappos angle

Verified fact ends above. The Blappos interpretation: humanity stared at the recycling symbol and decided it was a recipe. The future vending machine will accept one bottle, add vanilla and dispense the snack you technically brought from home.

Read the ScienceDaily report ↗

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Three ridiculously relevant Amazon finds

Cover of Plastic: A Toxic Love Story by Susan FreinkelAMAZON FIND 01Plastic: A Toxic Love StoryThe background reading for a love story that has now reached the deeply complicated “eat the bottle” phase.SEE THE EXACT ITEM →Cover of Cookies: The New Classics by Jesse SzewczykAMAZON FIND 02Cookies: The New ClassicsA cookie book from the final innocent era, when “new classic” did not mean polyethylene terephthalate.SEE THE EXACT ITEM →Cover of The 3D Printing HandbookAMAZON FIND 03The 3D Printing HandbookThe production manual for anyone whose bakery now requires software, microbes and a materials-science waiver.SEE THE EXACT ITEM →

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